I learned a new saying recently, CRE which stands for “Church Ruins Everything.” This morning Emily and I went out to IHOP for breakfast. Down the road from where we live is a baptist church as well as an affiliated school, K-12. Like many churches they put “witty” sayings out on their little whiteboard signs. However today’s saying really pissed me off. I sat there stewing over it, but by time we got to IHOP and had breakfast, I was more focused on the absolutely disgusting looking “Horton Hears A Who” pancakes the kids at the table next to us were eating.
From IHOP.com
Now they could be really yummy, but I wasn’t about to try them. Furthermore the kids at the table next to use were playing with them as much as they were eating them. I’m getting off track though. On the way back home we passed the church again and I got angry all over again. So much so that I walked down to take a photo and blog about it. Here is the photo, with the offending church’s name spray-painted out. If I wasn’t such a good person I would have actually spray-painted the sign then taken the photo.
Normally if someone said this to me, I would take it as a joke and that they literally meant it’s easier to walk downhill than up. But given it’s on this church’s sign, I don’t think that’s what they mean at all. I read this as saying “Life sucks and is hard, if yours is going good than you are probably going to hell.”
I should point out while there are many types of baptist churches, this is the kind from the movie “Footloose.” No, I’m serious. They don’t have proms because dancing is wicked or what not. Instead they have senior banquets where they bring their dates to eat food and do who knows what else. I think when you are dancing it means you are in good spirits and happy, therefore that makes God and Jesus happy. Maybe if these people danced a little more their life wouldn’t be so hard and suck so much?
To quote Men Without Hats “We can dance if we want to, we can leave your friends behind. Cause your friends don’t dance and if they don’t dance, well they’re no friends of mine!”
Oh that would so get on my nerves. I get so tired of seeing those “witty” phrases on church signs around where I live… it’s like they keep trying to guilt you into converting. I just saw a new one yesterday on the corner of my neighborhood that says “free wireless access to God here with no roaming fee”. That one wasn’t so bad but the one on just a block away shames us for letting the dust collect on the bibles on our shelves. When I saw those…I had to wonder…do they google these little sayings? LOL I wonder if there is an actual site that breaks them down in categories like “funny sayings” or “shaming phrases” LOL
I see you are on online! I’ve never gotten a chance to see you on your webcam so that’s cool 🙂
i saw those pancakes at ihop and i agree, they looked gross, even my 7 year old son thought so. we did, however, get the dr. seuss drink. it is sprite with little squares of red and blue jello in it. it is awesome! you can’t take a drink without getting jello, it’s like a jello shot! mmmmmmmmmm
If I saw a sign like that I would get quite angry myself. We have churches that put up their little sayings and whatnot, but nothing to this level. Or least nothing that implies you will go to hell.
I’ve seen the commercials for those Horton pancakes and they just turn my stomach every time I see it.
Those pancakes look nasty!
I bet that any kid that eats that has one major sugar high afterwards!
I was at IHOP on Saturday and the kids at the next table had the same thing! (Didn’t distract me from my chicken sandwich though…)